"It's c-c-cold, chatter chatter."

 

"That's how I know I'm loved. Best friends always hang up on each other."

 

"Give it baaaack, it's miiiine!"

 

"And there were little brats just *flit flit flit* running around and yelling!"

 

"Oh jeez...I need to shut up now, don't I?"

 

"I'm the little Eskimo people from Backlavidiouslyvahn!"

 

"What? Would you rather me go around and stick my hands down other people's pants and feel THEIR underwear?"

 

"My conclusion: It is useless to dry off with a wet towel."

 

"Fik a spandwich while you wait."

 

"I'm not ALL stupid, ya know."

 

"Dude, this is SO not cool."

 

"I blew it, didn't I?"

 

"Get off me, you freak!"

 

"Did you just say you had to get in there and cure your munchies...?"

 

"My hair looked fine...until I turned on the light."

 

"STOP MOLESTING MY PILLOW!"

 

"Step on my foot, it's numb."

 

"How come suck and blow mean the same thing? I mean when...like people say...'this day sucked,' or 'that test blows'. It'd be like...life in a vaccuum sucks.......or blows, if you put it in reverse."

 

"This is an authentic American penny, and I am willing to sell it to you for the low, low price of only 25 cents! And upon purchasing this authentic American penny, you will also receive a complimentary piece of plastic from a Reese's Pieces wrapper..."

 

"Oh yes, I just cannot resist a man in pinstripe PJs."

 

"The suspect was in our custody, sir, and I would have brought him in for questioning, but while my partner and I were investigating a cow birthing a litter of puppies, a giant praying mantis stole our patrol car and the suspect was trampled by a herd of stampeding catfish."

 

"We live life on the edge! We go to GENERAL ADMISSION concerts!"

 

"I have mastered the art of eating without getting anything on me...I have mastered the art of drinking without getting anything on me...Now let's see if i can brush my teeth without getting toothpaste in my hair."

 

"The director of Final Destination 2 supports cannibalism!"

 

"I feel compelled to step on the moving carpet lump."